Under the bludgeonings of chance

I have not had the greatest of times of late, and it makes the optimistic tone of my previous blog entry seem cloyingly naive. As I read it through before starting to write this one I felt almost embarrassed at myself.

Needless to say I'm not in a happy place right now. I'm certainly not doing any writing. I'm not in the right mindset and I don't think anyone would enjoy anything I wrote if I was.

I've spent my time this week trying to correct this little hiccup in my life, and as I've been doing so I've found myself bewildered at the places my mind has gone. When things calm down in the evenings and my mind is at some measure of rest, an inordinate amount of my thoughts have been settling on the Mass Effect series. For reasons that entirely escape me. Maybe because they're games portraying a character trying to maintain control of a desperately spiralling situation and I currently feel some affinity for that. I don't know.

In any case, I'm sure there's a Comfy Chair article about it in me. If I do write something about Mass Effect it'll be a challenge not to let it turn into a Jennifer Hale love fest. Mark Meer is not Commander Shepard.

But not right now. I have more pressing matters to attend to for the time being. Hopefully in a few weeks I'll be feeling more ready to get stuck into some writing. I have a list of things to do a mile long. Maybe once things straighten themselves out I can give myself the kick up the arse I've probably needed for a good long while.

Optimist Prime

Feeling good about the next few months!

Now that the new website has settled down and bedded in, I'm turning my attention towards the next few writing projects.

At the moment I'm in contact with Jack Tempest regarding the art for Malice Aforethought, which I'm already starting to feel good about, and I'm ruminating on the first updates to the website. I have an addition to the Graveyard planned, which is an old idea of mine that exposes some of the serious shortcomings of my early attempts at writing. I know, I'm so brave for being willing to put this old stuff online for all to see. In addition I'm chewing over an idea which will hopefully become a piece for The Comfy Chair.

In fiction terms, the idea currently occupying the most real estate in my brain is my retool of Imagine. I want to develop this ASAP, mostly so I can have something solid to pitch at this year's batch of comic shows. That said, it's also in order to scratch that particular itch, leaving me free to soldier on with Hudson Falls.

My mind is swimming a bit at the moment. I'm assuming that it's the euphoria of actually having a creative plan of attack for a change. But it could be the residual hangover from my boozy birthday weekend. It's hard to tell the difference sometimes.

In Increments

Don't want to speak too soon, but it's looking good for a weekend announcement. The website issues have been sorted, which has unfortunately resulted in an email account issue that will hopefully be resolved this afternoon.

I'm recklessly soldiering on with my optimism, with nary a thought for the inevitable disappointment.

Frustration

Yeah, so the website didn't launch last weekend. It's proving to be a bit of a ballache to wait for the DNS changes to propogate, which is the only thing between me and a live website right now.

Frustrated is not the word. Imagine how churlish and moody I usually am and double it. The website is done and good to go, but nobody can see it yet because of awkward bloody internet nonsense.

Grr.

Not a happy puppy.

Leeds me not into temptation

So Thought Bubble came and went, and I'm left wondering how in the hell I got through it all in one piece. On Saturday night there was some measure of alcoholic beverages which were partaken of at a party in a big round room, and thus I spend most of Sunday desperately trying to hold myself upright. I'm too old for such excess these days.

That being said, it was a phenomenal weekend. Highlights included: Finally meeting Cy Dethan after missing him at the last few shows and picking his not-inconsiderable brains for advice about pitching to publishers; listening to Jon Lock and Lucy's bizarre and hilarious idea for a time travel story that had me in stitches; and dancing Gangnam Style with Karen Rubins for as long as our enthusiasm could maintain (which admittedly wasn't very long.)

Big thanks to everyone for making the experience so great, especially on a Sunday that could very easily have just become a nausea-fuelled blur. I really wasn't very well at all.

Mostly, it was fun to catch up with folks, see their new projects and pick up a few copies while my cash lasted. They know who they are, and the list is long, so I won't name names. Needless to say if you read this and a small part of you goes "D'aww," I mean you. Hugs all round.

I came away from Leeds exhausted, but inspired to throw myself back into my writing at a time when I have admittedly become a bit lazy and lethargic about the whole thing. I've made a list of things to do over the coming months, and although Christmas is looming there is no need for me to check it twice. Everything on it needs to be done, and so I have some goals which I just have to spin into a schedule of activity and on I go.

Happy times.

Relatively dull update.

Work continues at a gentle pace. Telling a story with just words is very hard after so long of basically describing pictures and having other people do the storytelling. Fun though. I'm feeling pretty good about myself right now.

Basically, I'm looking at a schedule of a chapter a week. If I can stick to that, by the end of the year I'll have another sixteen chapters done. I'm expecting some will be shorter than others, so maybe more than sixteen. Hopefully that'll be a full book. Draft 1, of course, but just in time to meet the deadline. I can spend next year on, you know, making it good.

In other news, I had a Calippo today. It was nice.

Blimey...

So, August went by quite fast, didn't it? I don't know if it's got anything to do with my computer woes keeping me away from internetty things or what, but it feels like I blinked and I missed an entire month. I do not like it when things like that happen. No blog entries for a month? Tsk, tsk, Darren, you should feel shame for being so naughty.

So then, with four months left of the year, I find myself with an insurmountable obstacle in front of me - to write a novel in that time. It's not going to happen, is it? Still, I shall endeavor to get as much of it done as possible. If I set myself the goal of at least one chapter every week, I can get the best part of the first draft finished by Christmas. Hell, If I'm lucky I might manage to get the whole thing done. If that happens, it's getting entered into the Pratchett competition, even if it's in the form of a ragged-around-the-edges first draft. It'll stand about as much chance of winning as monkeyscribbles in crayon and poo have of winning the Turner Prize, but the important thing is that I'm writing prose again. Maybe that means that sometime during the first half of next year I can call it done and start pitching it.

Which is where I'm rubbish, I have realized. Good at writing, terrible at selling scripts to folks. I seriously need to work on that aspect. I''m not looking forward to having to do that, I can tell you.

On the writing side, things are happening again. Hudson Falls is getting done, slowly, although it'll pick up speed soon enough. The Dead Roots anthology from Mike Garley has begun the countdown to wising fwom its gwabe, and I'm awaiting with baited breath for an imminent update regarding my contribution on that. There's no news on the Murder, Malice & Teeth or Bayou Arcana fronts as yet, although with the winter season of comic book events about to begin shortly, I'm sure there will be things to report in the weeks and months to come.

Oh, and there's also something going on with Harrowing of Hell, but Jack is handling that and it's all very hush hush. So shhhh. You ain't seen me, right?

Anyway, I must get back to Hudson Falls. It's not going to write itself.

Of Couse I'll Wonder

It's been of a bit of a mad week, truth be told, and not for writerly reasons. However, for those non-writerly reasons I unfortunately have nothing new to report. Curses.

One thing I did do was watch the Olympic "Isles of Wonder" opening ceremony. That was interesting. I was a bit pissed when I did, so at the time just let the noise wash over me and assumed that it'd probably make sense later. Then I watched it again and realised: Oh, no. It genuinely was that odd. Liked it, though.

Which is strange because I don't think I was supposed to. It'd be easy to be very cynical about it. It gave the cynic a lot of ammunition with which to be cynical - it was cloying, twee and occasionally a bit smug. But that's the point of Olympic opening ceremonies and criticising them for that reason is like slagging off the sea because you went for a swim in it and got your hair wet.

An Olympic ceremony basically broadcasts a nation's self-image to the world, and what Danny Boyle chose to broadcast was garish, eclectic and just a little unfathomable. So job's a good 'un, then. God help the overseas commentators trying to explain some of that to their home audiences.

The Industrial Revolution section was the highlight. Mostly because it played out like a live production of The Scouring of The Shire. Kenneth Brannagh's sideburns were a happy bonus.

But there was a disappointing lack of Iron Maiden. Gutted.

You don't frighten me, sunshine.

It seems I'm suffering a crisis of confidence of some sort. After several years of writing nothing but comics, my ability to write simple prose has taken a bit of a hit. Doing it is also giving me the fear.

I was not expecting to be so nervous about doing this. Methings there will be much agonising over details in the weeks and months to come. I also can't help but feel it might be silly of me to bomb straight into writing a whole book without first warming up on something shorter and easier. That would be the sensible option.

But screw it, where's the fun in being sensible

So it's a novel and it currently feels quite intimidating, and what I have written so far is bloody awful. Bring it on, bitch. I will soon be eating through your pages like a mad thing.

Stupid technology...

It seems my break from writing is becoming even longer than anticipated. Unforeseen problems with my email account and general PC troubles are getting in the way. In short, there are issues with my domain which mean I currently can't send or receive any emails, and my computer appears to be melting, albeit quite slowly.

I'm sorting everything out gradually, but apart from the odd foray that I can steal while my PC is working, or on someone else's rig, radio silence is to be maintained for a little longer.

Frightfully sorry, old beans. I know you must miss me so.

Ahh, silence.

My computer has stopped making funny noises for the time being. You can all relax, I'm still here for now.

As I was saying, I'm not sure what I'm going to do when reporting on my progress with Hudson Falls. I guess I'll just bomb into the rewrite and do what seems best at the time.

The storming of the brains.

I was thinking today about what to do about my blog posts as I rewrite Hudson Falls. I tried to be a bit more in-depth with the reports of the writing process of Murder Malice & Teeth, but I kind of don't want to do the same thing again. Pretty sure there's only so many ways I can write about how difficult the writing process can be before it starts to sound a bit self-indulgent and whiny.

I was toying with the idea of writing blog entries in character as the protagonist of Hudson Falls, chronicling the events of the story as I write them. "The Secret Diary of Eric Hudson, aged 28 & 3/4" sort of thing. It seemed nicely meta, and I figured it'd be a good idea to get my hand in with prose again before I slog into that elusive novel I keep mentioning.

I dunno. My brain kind of feels like it's stuck in neutral at the moment.

Erk, hang on, my PC has just started making weird noises. I think that means it's time to put it to bed for the night. Will have to cut this week's entry a bit short.

Gearing up

I'll level with you - not very much is going on at the moment. I'm mostly chilling out and gathering together the stuff I'll be taking to the comic shows in Bristol and London over the next two weekends, so not very much progress is being had in other areas.

I should have a better write up next week - I'll have the Bristol show to talk about, at which I'm sure goings on will be going on, so until then I don't have anything to report.

Been getting caught up with a few TV shows I've been meaning to catch up on and get some reading done. This week I finally get through Dorian bloody Grey, I promise myself that. I know it's Wilde, and it's a classic and all, but it's not really my cup of tea. I'm going to get it done, however. Not letting the thing defeat me, no siree.

I have no hands!

Or at least it feels that way. My keyboard has died and I'm typing this with the on-screen keyboard, which is slow and rubbish. Must get new one. This will not do...

...and a tardy slip for you, Mr. McFly. Four in a row.

Sorry, this blog entry is a day late. I got distracted by all the nothing I was doing this weekend, and forgot to write it. My bad.

So, Murder, Malice & Teeth (or MMT as I will refer to it from now on) is done and done. There were some last minute changes that I had to make, and there were several setbacks along the way, but done is done and I can now sit back and keep my fingers crossed for some good news.

These blog entries have been useful. They basically kept me going just so I'd have something to report each week, so terrified was I of lagging behind and having nothing to report. It wasn't exactly to the schedule I planned - I hoped to have it done by the end of March - but three weeks late isn't bad for a self-imposed deadline. The important thing is that I got it done, and the blog entries helped a lot. Even if they were of interest to nobody else, they at least partially served their purpose.

I think I might do something similar with future works, because if they can provide anything like as much of a kick up the arse for every project, my output will increase tenfold. Which would be nice.

So seeing as my current project is done, I'm taking this week off from all things writerly to catch up on my TV and my gaming. I've got a stack of DVDs and a brand new membership of Netflix to put to good use, and I've redoubled my efforts to fire up some of my lonely, neglected consoles to get through some of my back catalogue of games. First stop is Bayonetta, which I understand is a bit like Devil May Cry, only even more bonkers and pervy.

Which sounds like a fantastic place to spend my evenings before starting preparations to write a children's novel. It's called "Empty" and it's not going to be very nice.

While that's going on, I have a few other things to consider. I've not given up on my collaboration with Jack Tempest that was originally written for Clint, so you may see more of that in the coming months. Plus there are the Bristol and Kapow shows next month, and I'm attending both. Don't forget on Sunday 20th May I'll be on the Independent Comics Panel with a few others of the Bayou Arcana crew, which should have a blog entry in it at the very least. My first appearance at a comics show as a guest and not a punter. Result.

Another Step Forward

Draft 2 of 'Broken' is complete! The 'Chronological Edit' is now done, and all that remains is to reassemble it into the original order and give the dialogue the once over.

This stage of the process was quite educational. I realised a few of the things I'd been doing were a bit redundant. There was a lot of repetition in there, mostly because I lost track of who had said what and when, so I had a few instances where the characters would go over the same material. It's given me a chance to edit that out and replace it with more pertinent character information and exposition. Now I know nothing occurs out of sequence, and everything that's there needs to be there.

I've used the opportunity to further explore some of the themes that underline the story itself, so that the villain's irritating habit of smugly smiling at the hero is given more emphasis. It makes him seem that much more of a patronising arsehole. I also found room to slip in a few references to the idea of wasting your second chances, which heightens the notion that the hero has become so obsessed with the past sins committed against him that he may well have been squandering other opportunities to turn his life around. I'm not sure if I've made enough of it to make the grade, but it's an interesting notion nonetheless and it currently forms the backbone of the ending and gives him a bit more character growth.

There's a few more things to do once I've rebuilt it into its proper shape. Some of the dialogue is a bit unconvincing - my working class squaddie character has a tendency to become a bit sesquipedalian, which is a bit out of character, and I'd like to slang up his dialogue a bit more. There's less work to do with the other characters, but they could probably use a lick and spit, too.

And there it is - quite a productive week so far. Roll on Draft 3!

Still no new title, though...

A Week of Doing Nothing

Last week was my week off, so there's no progress to report. Rather than slogging my guts out, I sat around eating takeaways, playing video games and watching episodes of The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr. It was bliss, and Bruce Campbell is the man.

This week will be back to work, however. Boo.

But for me, it was Tuesday.

Cor, today was busy. I got through a big 9 page splurge on Broken, and I've finally reached the final confrontation bit. I'm going to have to work hard to make sure I tie up as many loose ends as I have space for. There is much for my characters to discuss as they beat the tar out of each other on the edge of a cliff.

Like money and power. Friends. Traps. And teeth.

Actually I'm not sure I have space for that last one. There's a subplot about the villain's smile that I haven't had much of a chance to develop as much as I would have liked, so I'm not sure if it'll make the final cut. But meh. It's a first draft. I can cut it out or add more stuff in at the redraft stage if it doesn't work as it is.

I did a quick scan through the scenes in chronological order tonight too, just the see if they made sense. They pretty much do. There are a few things here and there that I need to tinker with, but for the most part it seems to flow well. That spreadsheet I made in the early days of all the events and how they relate to the characters really came in handy.

Sometimes having OCD is a boon.

12 pages to go. I should get it done by Sunday, fingers crossed. Go me.

Quick quick hurry just type it and hit post already...

Just a quick flying visit to the internet this week, as my head is still full of hangover after birthday frolics and I'm incapacitated beyond the point of rational thought.

It isn't actually my birthday until next weekend, but I had my celebrations this weekend for various reasons. Strap yourself in for next week's post, as it's likely to be full of self-pity. I've been feeling a bit sorry for myself being another year older.

Progress chugs along on Broken, much as it has been chugging. I might actually get it finished by the end of the month, as I've only got another 18 or so pages to do. It's not leaving me any rewrite time, but I'll decide what I'm doing with that when this draft is done.

It's certainly been an odd one to write so far. Sometimes it's felt really easy, other times less so. I did a semi-rewriter this week, as I originally wrote it with captioned narration where the main character directly addresses the reader, but it didn't really work so I'm trying to revise it into a kind of 'ranting and raving within his own head' sort of narration that works a bit better with his character.

This week I also changed a pretty major twist in the story. It was intended to weave a few extra layers of betrayal and scheming into the story, but I realised that it's not really needed and it works better if it's a bit more straightforward. I'm getting pretty confident that the end result is going to be very good.

Now that I've written that, I mist go lie down. My brain has an owie.

Back to work

...so now that I am finally back online I've been able to start writing Broken again. I haven't managed to do a lot - mostly just getting through the opening scene. I've been trying to make sure enough relevant information about the plot is there to make what's going on clear, but still leave a lot unexplored in order for it to be revealed later. I think it's going quite well. The opening is punchy, visual and interesting.

In the dark days before my internet was reconnected, I didn't do any writing - I tried, but I did't realise how often I have to look things up online as I write. It made the whole process incredibly frustrating, so I made the decision to do a little pen-and-paper work instead. It was all about working out the order of events, structure of the story and when certain things will be revealed, etc.

The story has wound up as another 'dual timelines running in parallel and intercutting' type of story, which is a device I use a lot. It works and I like it, and although I may use it a bit too often in my writing, it's a good way to add an additional layer to the story and to keep the reader wanting to move forward through it. It also allows you to build a series of mini-cliffhangers into the story as it progresses, which can help build a sense of intrigue/suspense/whatever you want to call it. It's not easy to get the structure right, and one little change can seriously screw everything up, so the order of events needs to be carefully plotted out beforehand. So that's been keeping me busy.

In other news, Come & See was unfortunately rejected, which was disappointing but not a total surprise. It got some good feedback, which was encouraging, but basically it still doesn't have a home. Another thing I'll have going on while writing Broken will be to compile a list of alternative publishers for Come & See and start sending the submission pack out to them. It's not an enormous list, but it should keep me occupied for a while.

There have also been some developments in the world of Bayou Arcana that have been a bit disappointing. I'm not sure how much I can talk about, but suffice to say I'm still very much in the book, and have volunteered my services for May's Kapow show, where the book has a panel going on.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a teensy hangover and need to go lie down for a bit. You have no idea how difficult it has been to make this blog entry even this coherent...